over the garage, I was in a shit mood. I’d been in a shit mood for days. Since my fight with Reagan. I’d fought with Jenny right after Reagan left that day, but I didn’t give a shit about that. I was used to fighting with Jenny. Just because we didn’t fight anymore didn’t mean I’d ever be out of practice. We’d perfected the art of hating each other during our short marriage.
I felt like the fight with Reagan had left me jagged on the inside and the pieces kept catching on shit. I felt volatile. I’d broken multiple parts at work and snapped at people too many times to count. It ate me up to know that she thought I’d never given a shit about her. It ate me up to know that I’d done things to make her feel that way.
I looked around the apartment and felt restless. Iris should’ve been there, distracting me with her hearts and butterflies personality, but the girls had all been invited to a sleepover with another friend at school. It just made my mood worse to not have my daughter around when she should’ve been.
I paced over to the window and looked out. The moon was bright with no clouds in the sky, casting long shadows everywhere I looked. I knew I should’ve gone with the guys to Charlie’s to drink myself stupid, but I wasn’t good company. There was no reason to drag them down. Especially not when August was flying high after spending time with Reagan a few nights ago.
I swallowed hard at the thought of the marks on her neck. I was jealous of my best friend. Of course, I couldn’t even be mad at August. He didn’t breathe a word about their encounter, but I knew it wasn’t Charlie who’d left the marks because he’d pissed her off, too. We seemed to be great at that.
Movement behind my truck caught my attention and I shifted forward. Lunar wasn’t without its crime, though it was rare. I was not in the mood to have my truck messed with and I felt sorry for whoever tried that night. As I watched, though, I saw that it was Reagan.
She moved back and forth, talking to herself. She walked towards the door to my apartment and then turned away, just to repeat the process over and over again. In a dress small enough to make my blood boil and heels that wobbled dangerously on the uneven pavement of the lot, she was a vision of creamy skin and dark hair. Even as she clearly debated with herself, having all the potential to look insane, I thought she was the prettiest woman I’d ever seen.
Opening the window, unwilling to let her leave if the debate ended poorly for me, I stuck my head out and whistled. “It’s too late now. I’ve already seen you. Might as well come on up.”
Reagan jumped at the sound of my voice and slapped her hand over her chest. “You scared me!”
“I’ll let you up.” I wasn’t giving her an out. I wanted to see her, even if it meant that she was just going to yell at me.
I unlocked the downstairs door with my phone and opened the top door to wait for her. My heart raced painfully until I heard the door downstairs opening. Relieved, I locked the door behind her and stepped aside.
The closer she got, the more I could see how little she wore. The dress was barely more than a dish towel, highlighting her mile-long legs and small but sexy chest. When she moved past me, I saw that the entire back was missing.
“Jesus.”
Reagan turned around and looked so damn innocent as she questioningly raised her eyebrows. “What?”
I ran my hands through my hair and forced myself to be calm. “Nothing. You look beautiful. Did you have fun with Megan and Kara?”
Her eyes brightened and she nodded. “Kara is amazing. She’s a jewelry designer. She’s going to design me a few pieces.”
I motioned for her to sit on the couch and sank into the chair across from her. I nearly bit through my fist as the dress showed even more of her thighs as she sat. “I’ve never met her. Megan isn’t really a fan.”
Dropping her eyes to her hands, she seemed to be debating with herself again. Finally, she looked up at me and blew out a deep breath. “She saw what Jenny did to me and heard the things she said, even after I was gone. She drew a very clear line in the sand, even when I wasn’t a good friend to her. You were on the other side, with Jenny.”
I sat forward and rested my elbows on my knees. “I was.”
“You said you wanted to talk. I don’t really know what I’m doing here. I was walking home and I saw your lights on, so I detoured. I’m not even sure there’s anything to talk about. I just thought… I thought I’d try.”
My heart beat faster again. A chance. She was giving me a chance. “Can I get you something to drink?”
Nodding, she ran her palms down her thighs and laughed awkwardly. “An entire bottle, if you don’t mind.”
I grabbed us both bottles of beer and sat across from her again, even though I wanted to sit next to her. “Unfortunately, I don’t keep anything harder than beer around.”
“This is probably best. Last time I got hammered, I slept with three guys.” She met my gaze and we both laughed, breaking some of the tension.
When the silence stretched on again, I groaned. “I guess this is where I start.”
She nodded. “Please.”
“I don’t know if you remember much about my family, but it’s massive. Tons of uncles, aunts, cousins, brothers, and sisters. It’s almost scary how fast they reproduce. I grew up in that, knowing that I would just do the same thing. There wasn’t money to go around so no one even encouraged the kids to dream of leaving. What would be the point?” I gripped the bottle hard and shook my head. “This shit always feels like a pity party, but I don’t mean it like that.”
“Just talk, Theo. I’m not judging you.”
“It’s just that the guys all had something. They had plans. Charlie had football. Russ had college. August had the Navy. They were all leaving and they knew they were from early on. I just knew that I was staying around and that I’d start a family because that’s what the family does.” I shifted in my seat, uncomfortable. “Then, everyone left. I was aimless. I liked racing cars and bikes at the dirt tracks and I was good at it, but no one thought that was a real job.
“I was lost after just a month of being here alone and Jenny had always been around. She never strayed far away and I latched onto her. I did what I was supposed to do. I didn’t love her, but she was there for me, I thought. I proposed, we got married, and we had Iris.”
“Who is adorable.” Smiling, Reagan sat forward in her seat, her eyes warm. “You made a cute fucking kid.”
“She’s the best thing that’s ever happened to me. I tried to stay with Jenny because I was afraid I’d lose Iris, but eventually, I couldn’t do it anymore. She made me miserable. She hated the racing, hated that I wasn’t at college like the other guys. When they came home, it was clear that she hated you so much out of jealousy.”
Reagan’s eyes widened. “Do you mean…?”
“She wanted the full team.” I laughed at the expression on her face, finding humor in a situation that usually just left me feeling embarrassed. “Divorcing Jenny is the second-best thing that’s ever happened to me. I pissed my entire family off, but it was worth it. Thankfully, Jim and Mary are great and wouldn’t let Jenny cut me off from Iris. That’s why I’m close with them and go over to see them. They keep Iris during Jenny’s time usually and they welcome me over to be with them, no Jenny, whenever I want.”
“They seem like amazing people. I truly don’t understand how Mary made Jenny.” Making a face, Reagan stuck her tongue out like she’d tasted something bad. “Demon spawn, maybe?”
I laughed. “Maybe.”
She grew serious as she stood up and moved to stand in front of me. “It’s over for you and Jenny? No chance of reconciliation?”
I gripped the sides of the chair to keep from grabbing her. “Not a chance in hell.”
“She’s just wearing your ring and you’re stopping by for swims because…?”
“Can’t tell you why she’s wearing the ring. Probably just to establish some sort of bullshit dominance over you in her head. And I didn’t stop by for a swim. I stopped by to see you and eat a sandwich. A sandwich that you didn’t let me have in the end. That was all just more of Jenny’s games. The same with her calling me hon like she’s referred to me as anything other than asshole in the last few years.”
“I can trust you?” The vulnerability in Reagan’s face cost me my battle with my self-control.
I stood up and pulled her into my arms, holding her face against my chest. “You can trust me.”
She slowly wrapped her arms around my waist. “Your heart is racing.”
I grunted. “It’s the dress. Definitely just the dress.”
“Theo?”
“Reagan?”
“Will you take me to bed now?”
